Today was a better day. It wasn’t the greatest, but it was much brighter. Me and Reu held a conversation. It wasn’t face to face due to me being at school and him being at home. But, it definitely alleviated a lot of the pain I was feeling. It made me realize giving up was not an option, and it never will become one. However, his words constantly linger in my head and still bother me.
So, I’ve been weighing my options and trying to think about the moments when we were happiest. The happiest times we shared were when we weren’t cohabiting. So, I want to go back to living on my own until we are officially married and regularly participating in couples therapy.
Now I am not saying that we can not live together and happily coexist. We can. However, when we just had sleepovers our relationship was more intimate. We were more in tune with one another and went out of our way to demonstrate it. So operation find my own place is in full effect.
But, now I have to find the best way to lay it on him. There is no way to tell him that without hurting him and there will never be a perfect time. But, it has to be done eventually. Preferably, the sooner the better…right? I don’t want to hurt his feelings , but at the same time he didn’t value mine when he insinuated that I was a liar and was using him for my personal convenience.
So, now what is the next move? How do I go about telling him? If only I knew the answers I’d tell you. But, I don’t as of now. However, once I know so will you. Peace, love, and a Dose of Daisy.