Posted in Uncategorized

Word of the Week

Too often we fail to take responsibility for our flaws and poor decisions.  Instead, we tend to find excuses and point the blame.  So this week’s word is accountability.  What is accountability?  Accountability is a noun. The definition is the quality or state of being accountable.  It is also an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions.

Accountability is something that I am always working to improve.  I love being involved in numerous activities. But, finding time for extra-curricular activities on top of school, work, dating and having a social life usually means something is not getting 100% effort put into it.

For example, this is my last year of undergraduate and I was considering pledging so I decided to get involved more on campus.  The activity I chose was being a manager for the Lady Panther’s Basketball Team.  It was cool and I really liked it because I really enjoy basketball.  But, it was so time-consuming even with four other managers.  We literally never had a free moment. We were always recording practice and games, organizing gear, restocking fridges, and cleaning up after the players.

It was a lot. Especially since it would have me on campus from sunrise to sunset.  Although, this did not bother me.  It took a toll on my relationship.  We only saw each other when I would try to silently maneuver around the house in the dark while trying not to wake Reuben up… which I sucked at by the way!

This led to petty arguments about me needing to learn how to be respectful of other people’s sleep that would blow up to word wars.  Each word cutting deeper than the last time. I thought Reuben was an inconsiderate asshole each time, but I was very oblivious to the underlying issue. I needed to hold myself accountable for placing my college activities before my relationship and home life. So, I did.

I cut back on the temporary extracurricular activities and focused on what I wanted forever… a happy relationship.  So, I cut back on hanging out on campus and late night events.  This allowed me to focus on my personal life and better my relationship. I can honestly say taking accountably and focuing on my priorities was one of my greatest decisions by far, and for that I am forever grateful.  So, when taking on task remember to not only prioritize but also hold yourself accountable.  Peace, love, and a dose of Daisy.

Posted in Uncategorized

A Bid Farewell

I have vigorously been working on this post for the last two weeks yet I still can’t seem to find the desired direction it should take.  I have deleted about six different drafts, and now I am just going to say how I feel at the moment.

I am sad.  I do NOT think I will ever accept them leaving office unless Michelle decides to run.  I loved watching the Obama’s work not just as a political unit, but as a family.  Their bonding moments that were continuously captured gave us that much-needed feeling of a personal relationship. I am sad that I will no longer have a black president displaying, strength, love, and dedication.  However, I will find a way to get through the moments of feeling that void.

I am happy. I had the chance of seeing a Bi-racial assume office.  Then, he served a second term. Obama completed this without any scandals taking place too. That alone is amazing because so many people wanted to see Barack slip under the bus.  But, he did not!  He did his best to keep his business life and personal life separate. He stood his ground despite all odds. He constantly showed #BlackExcellence, #BlackLove, and #MelantatedMagic.

But, I am also upset.  I am upset that tomorrow you will be resigning so Trump can take the throne.  I am still trying to understand how a man with no political experience will get to run this country.  A man who despises diversity is now going to be responsible for the United States melting pot.  I am upset that I could not re-elect Obama again. I am upset Michelle did not run instead of Hilary. I am upset that nobody wanted to feel the burn with Bernie. However, I will overcome.

I will overcome because the Obama’s are leaving me inspired. They have given me tunnel vision on achieving #BlackExcellence.  Their impact was heavier than a wrecking ball and I am forever grateful for it. Not only do I want more for myself, I also want more for my community and the people in it with me. So, I will continue to plan for improvement.  My dreams will become reality. But for now, just watch and take notes. Daisy has tons up her sleeve. Peace, love, and a dose of Daisy.

Posted in Uncategorized

Word of the Week…

There are so many words that we tend to hear on a regular basis, but often forget their meaning. At least when the time comes for us to apply them. So, every Sunday I will post a word of the week.  Daisy’s weekly word for January 15, 2017 is standards. This is a word everyone should be familiar with and apply to their everyday life.

Standards is a noun often used in plural form. The primary definition of standards is a level of quality or attainment.  The second definition states it is an idea or thing used as a measure, norm, or model in comparative evaluations.   Continue reading “Word of the Week…”

Posted in Uncategorized

How soon is too soon?

“Where would I be without my baby? The thought alone might break me.” These lyrics describe how I feel about my honey.  Who would have thought we would have gotten so far in such a short amount of time? Definitely not either one of us, but look at us now.  Seven months down the line and we are shacking up and engaged.  Ha! I never even saw it coming. I am glad that it did though.

Now, a lot of people have questioned me and Reuben’s dating timeline, our love, and our dedication to our relationship which resulted in me occasionally having to question US myself.  I mean sure it has not even been a year yet. However, over time I am rapidly beginning to realize it is nobody’s business, but ours.

See me and Reuben started talking in early April.  Then we had our first official date at this little Tex-mex spot called Gringos a few weeks later.   After we had our first date we were inseparable.  We spent 90% of our time together learning one another’s mannerisms, and the other 10% of the time we were talking and texting on the phone.  By Cinco de Mayo Mr. Reubie Reu was trying to make this thang official and I was all for it. Let the judging begin.

When this happened I could not wait to tell my girls cause I was the Nation’s Record Holder for not being able to get a man or even keep one.  So, I was feeling myself while on cloud 900. But, of course there is always that one Negative Nancy that wants to shit on your joy. This Nancy could not wait to find flaws in our bond, so that, I would want to regain membership to the Bitter Bitches Club.  However, that was not going to happen on my watch.  Me and the Reu had discussed our timeline and repeatedly reminded one another that nobody elses opinion mattered. Long as we were good everyone else was irrelevant. Which led us to keep pushing.

Now we were not perfect and I could not pretend we were even if I wanted to, but we are perfect for each other.  However, we know what works for us and we use it to our advantage.  But, I will be the first to say become happy and true colors will begin to show.  Nancy stayed in the picture due to her being one of my closest friends; I just made it my duty to keep her out my relationship regardless of good or bad.  Until August came around and my lease with my roommates ended and we all decided to go our separate ways. At this time Reuben invited me to come shack it up.  I work late nights serving and am currently a struggling college student so I was not completely opposed to the idea. Yet, it was new to the both of us. Neither of us had lived with a significant other and the timeline issue resurfaced again.

I was already had doubts because I did not believe in shacking up because I felt it made people become comfortable.  I also thought it would reduce my already low chances at becoming a wife.  So, I went to seek some advice from some friends and colleagues. MAjority of them were skeptical and thought it was too soon or just did not believe in living with someone without a ring which started to somewhat discourage me. Until I spoke with my coworkers Jo-nate and the Ripp.  Jo-nate just told me to consider all options and do what was best for not only me, but me and Reuben as a team.  But, the Ripp told me to just do it. I thought she was crazy.  She did not give me an explanation until days later.  But, when she explained it everything made sense.  She simply said “You won’t know if it works for you if you do not do it. If it does not fit for you then you can always move out and find another place. Just have faith and go into it open-minded.” So, I did it!

Mid-August I moved in and we made it work.  It was so simple.  Yes, we clashed and had to find our balance which we continuosly are working on.  But, it has been one of the best parts of our relationship in my personal opinion.  gods-timing

Living together definitely brought us closer.  It also built up our communication.  I thought we had great communication until we moved in together. Yet, I was partially wrong.  We both had some growing to do.  We needed to learn how to talk it out instead of give one another the silent treatment when upset.  We also learned proper interpretation of words. We often would interpret each others words for what we wanted them to be rather than for what they really meant.  For example, my go to phrase is “I guess,” I use it when I am still formulating a real response, when I am neutral on a situation, or as a way to cut a conversation short.  But, Reuben would take it as I was not feeling something and an attitude was brewing which was not usually the case. Although, I would explain this to him he already had this assumption set and would take my response negatively.  Just like I would take silence negatively.  I had to accept that silence is not always a bad thing. Some people legitimately like moments alone to meditate.   Every minute did not need require conversation.  We began to get it.

We developed our niche and ironed out our kinks.  We realized that we could live separately if needed, but neither one of us had the desire to do so… at least not for longer than a few hours after pessimistic bickering. We made it our duty to state our issues and dislikes immediately, have moments to ourselve, and to still go on dates like we did prior to or cohabitating.  This works for us and helped my boo realize he was ready to pop the million dollar question.

Yes, he did seven months of dating and I became a fiancé.  Yes, I did. Christmas of 2016 will remain unforgettable.  It will be one of the happiest days of my life, even though, I am not a fan of Christmas (I’ll save that tangent for another day).  Then, to make it even better the moment he asked me to marry him a timeline never crossed my mind. It was in that minute I realized you cannot put a time limit on a relationship.

When you choose to be with someone make sure you allow God to set up his agenda for your relationship.  The timing is not on your call. Just go with the flow of things and ignore everyone else because their opinions will set you back.  Listening to the Ripp and taking a chance led me to finding my happiness, and I would not change anything about it.  My journey has been everything I ever dreamed of and more. I can not wait to become a Johnson and share the good, bad, and ugly with you. Just wait on it.  Peace, love, and a Dose of Daisy.

Posted in Uncategorized

Bruh…….

Today I ran across a trending topic filled with what some think is buffoonery, but it is actually a huge disgrace.  The hashtag read #Itaintrape.  Below is just a screenshot of what appeared on my timeline.Screen Shot 2017-01-12 at 6.53.28 PM.png

This is pure fuckery at its finest. The fact that people sat up and made this a trending topic is not only sick, but rather disturbing.  There is no justification for forcing yourself inside someone without their consent. It never will be. So let us cover a few statistics.

For example, every 98 seconds someone is sexually assaulted.  This means that not a minute goes by without someone being sexually violated. I know that’s sick.  While 1 out of every 6 women will be a rape victim.  70% of these victims will experience moderate to severe distress often in the form of PTSD. The victims of sexual assault are also more likely to turn to drugs to numb the memories and pain caused from the assaults.  But, the craziest statistic is that 994 rapist out of 1000 will walk free.

That is horrific. How does 99.4% of rapist walk free?  Well, out of these 1000 rapes only 310 rapes will get reported. Then 57 out of the 310 reports will lead to an actual arrest.  But, out of the 57 arrest only 11 will get lead to prosecution.  Finally, out the 11 rapist being prosecuted 7 will become felons. Meanwhile only 6 will see the walls of a prison.  Less than 2% of rapist serve an actual sentence.   This should not be reality, but unfortunately it has to be.

Why don’t these victims come forward and tell?  Some fear retaliation, a few do not think the police would assist them, and then a couple did not want to go through the humiliation.  I totally understand their reasoning because too many times are the sexual offenders actions justified to some bull shit extent. These same excuses are now part of this stupid hash tag.  Who the hell raised these animals?

The only time that #itaintrape is when both parties involved consent to the act. But, even if both parties do consent and someone later changes their mind and says something along the lines of “No, stop” there is no longer any consent making it RAPE.  Consent is a requirement.  So, do not be stupid and remember #ITISRAPE without consent.

For more information on sexual assualt you can check out rainn.org and mecasa.org! If you are a victim of sexualt assualt feel free to call the National Sexual Assualt Hotline at any given time 800-656-HOPE (4673)! Peace, love, and a dose of Daisy.

Posted in Uncategorized

Getting to Know Daisy…

Who am I? I am DaSean, but refer to me as Daisy. The 23-year-old super senior that is going from girlfriend to future bride in the next 23 months. November 2018, I will become a Johnson and I can hardly wait. Although, there is so much time there still is not enough! With me wrapping up my last semester of college courses, completing 400 hours of field placement, and preparing for graduation planning time will pass me by if I don’t start early. But, luckily for my better-half I’ve been planning my dream wedding since I was in highschool and now I get to turn my dreams into my reality. This blog was created not only to document my thoughts, but to allow my family and friends to follow us amongst the journey. It will cover planning, phases of relationships, the aftermath, and so much more. Please feel free to ask questions, comment, and provide feedback, so that, I can become a better blogger. Peace, love, and a dose of Daisy.

Posted in Uncategorized

Oh the Places We Can Go….

I always knew I wanted a destination wedding.  However, the destination was always unknown.  Did I want a beach or national landmark? Would the seasons play a factor… to hell if I knew! But, one thing I was certain about was the destination selected would be great.  We looked up East Coast locations, but dead the idea once we realized November on the East Coast is freezing cold.  Which led us (well me) to making a list of the things we want at our Winter wedding.  For instance, I want the ability to choose on being outside or inside at any given moment if the weather is not in my favor.  I also want a venue with culture, class, and a vintage feel that compliments my rustic themed ideas.  Yes, I know I want a lot; HOWEVER, all my wants are achievable according to Pinterest and my conscious.  Am I willing to compromise? YES, but only after everything else has failed will I do so.

As of today my top locations are: New Orleans, Denver, or Phoenix.  But, the good ol’ NOLA is in the lead by a land slide.  There is so many different venues to choose from and they all possess tons of culture.  However, a lot of them are extremely pricey. This leading to me adding more stipulations to narrow down our selections.  I started by cutting out all venues that are not all-inclusive unless they are under $4,000.  This eliminated about 20 venues which still left a ton to choose from.  Then, I broke them down by price range.  Although, I am giving my wedding a $25,000 I still want a low-cost venue. That way my budget can also include a nice honeymoon.  By, cutting my ceremony budget I thought I would never find a nice spot that can hold both a ceremony and a reception but I was wrong.  While browsing locations on The Knot I found a venue offering everything that I wanted.

The amazing value I discovered is located 15 minutes outside of New Orleans in a town called Metaire, Louisiana.  The venue has been around over 40 years and has been in The Knot’s Hall of Fame for the past 6 years.  But, that’s not even the best part! The best part of this is that it’s less than 60% of my budget and all I have to bring is my cake and dress.  Can we say “Woot woot!”  Now, of course I am still going to weigh all my options and not settle on a site unseen, but for now I can stress less about a venue and focus on other thing like picking my bridal party, dress, and making a guest list.  All of which are more challenging than picking a venue because just like when people announce their pregnant all the long lost associates come out the dark and feel like they earned their plus one invite to sit at the table.

But, that is a topic for another day in a different week which will DEFINITELY be covered. Thanks for reading. Peace, love, and a dose of Daisy.